January in Belgium isn’t the most fun time for college students. Exams. A necessary thing to get that degree. It’s funny when I realize that just two months of my entire year are fully dedicated to it, yet these times seem very long, and my co-students and I like to complain about it. Basically it isn’t that bad, I know that, but right now I’m just caught up in the eat-sleep-study-waste time on the internet routine.
In high school I never stressed one bit about it. Probably because it was way easier back then, but also because I didn’t care, or study a lot. Now everything changed. I begin stressing as soon as the semester begins. It starts low with a climax right before the Christmas break a.k.a. when the real deal is about to happen. My anticipation anxieties and stress is so not necessary. Only this weekend I noticed how well prepared I was. I told myself last year, when I got my degree in Law, that I wouldn’t stress and worry so much in the future. Unfortunately I didn’t keep my own promise.
It seems to be that way with everything. I tell myself why things would go wrong, instead of listing all the reasons why they should go right. I’ve succeeded before, it should give me confidence. I try my best, even if I would fail, it’s not the end of the world now is it? Also in these times, my anxieties are more present. And then I say, I should really work on it. But I can’t do that within a week or a month. Afterwards when they get better I ignore ‘the problem’ and wait for the next episode of fear. (read my first post about anxiety here)
That’s why I really want to give it a try. My anxiety disorder popped up when I was 18, and it hit in bad. Back then I bought a program, which consists of CD’s, sort of self-therapy. The program is really good and seemed to have helped a lot of people. I started it, but ended somewhere around CD/week 8 or 9. In total there are 15 or 16. It helped me to get back to school, out of the house, problem solved. Of course it wasn’t. I always use it for crisis moments, and the rest of the time I ignore them. I still avoid places linked to the anxiety. I’m running away from it. I need to stop that. I need to give it a go and pursue the entire program for benefits in the long run. Not to go from one over-stressed situation to another.
That’s why, as soon as my exams are over, I will start the sessions again, and write about it weekly on my blog. Something like ‘Friday fears’, still working on a name. (Let me know if you have one 😉 ) I will write about how my week went by, and the successes and failures I made concerning the program. By the way, for those interested: this is the link to the program’s website. It is in Dutch though, so probably not useful for the majority.
So to come back to the exams. This is a period full of stress and anxieties for me, so I hope I can also work on this, to have self-confidence, and to not worry too much about it, because that is really not necessary, as long as you try your best! Good luck to all the students who still have exams, or congrats if you passed them 😉
Do you also have a lot of stress for exams.? How do you cope with exam stress? Does my ‘Friday fears’ seem like something you’d be interested in in reading? Let me know!